Goal Setting Alternatives: You're Not Bad at Goals, You Need a Better Map

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Goal Setting Alternatives: You're Not Bad at Goals, You Need a Better Map

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Note: This audio was created using AI voice technology (ElevenLabs) as part of my commitment to accessible content. I wrote every word, but used AI to narrate it so I could offer this format without burning out.

Every January, we do the goal setting thing: We set goals with so much intention. We buy the planner. We feel that spark. We're going to meal prep and go to the gym and finally start that side project and...

And then it's February, and none of it stuck.

And if you're like me—if you're someone who's accomplished genuinely hard things, who's built a whole life "resolviendo" (figuring it out)—this pattern doesn't just feel disappointing. It feels defeating.

Because your brain tells you: I've proven I can do hard things. I've navigated impossible situations. I've achieved things my family couldn't even imagine. So why can't I stick to something as simple as my own goals?

The conclusion feels inevitable: Something's wrong with me.

What if you've been trying to navigate with a map that's missing half the roads?

But what if it's not you? What if the framework itself is incomplete?

What if you've been trying to navigate with a map that's missing half the roads?

When Traditional Goal Setting Stops Working

You know this feeling in your bones.

You're a tree blowing in the wind. Every direction pulling at you. Work needs this, family needs that, you're trying to show up for your friends, your partner, yourself—and you're doing all of it at like 60% capacity because there's just too much.

For those of us who are first-gen, who come from immigrant families, who've spent our whole lives being The Responsible One™—this hits different.

We're not strangers to hard work. We literally built lives our parents could only dream about. We navigated systems that weren't designed for us. We figured out college applications with no roadmap. We translated documents and advocated and made it work when everyone said we couldn't.

So when we can't seem to follow through on our own carefully crafted goals? When the planner we bought with such hope just... sits there? When we keep moving that "weekly review" in our calendar like it's a game of Snake we're losing?

The self-blame spiral starts.

I just need more discipline. I just need better systems. Everyone else can do this, what's wrong with me?

I've been there. Hell, I've lived there for months at a time.

And here's what I finally figured out: The problem wasn't my commitment. It was the map.

The Problem wasn't my commitment. It was the map.

SMART Goals Aren't Wrong—They're Just Incomplete

Let me be clear: I'm not here to trash SMART goals.

Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound—this framework works. It's helped millions of people get clear and structured. It's not broken.

It's just... incomplete.

Here's what SMART goals assume about you:

✅	You'll make linear progress (steady march from A to B)
✅	Your capacity is basically stable (same energy, same resources, week after week)
✅	Thinking about the goal is enough to motivate action (logic will carry you through)

And here's the thing—if you're operating in a world where those assumptions are true, SMART goals are great.

But most of us aren't living in that world.

Most of us are navigating:

• Bodies that have opinions (and sometimes those opinions are "absolutely not today")

• Emotional landscapes that shift (grief, joy, anxiety, hope—sometimes all before breakfast)

• Seasons of life that change our capacity overnight (illness, caregiving, career shifts, identity transitions)

• The reality that we're whole humans, not productivity robots

So what's actually missing from the map?

Your body's wisdom. SMART goals don't ask: What does your nervous system say about this goal? When you imagine pursuing it, does your chest open or close? Are you overriding exhaustion to chase something that just looks good on paper?

Your emotional truth. Feelings aren't obstacles to overcome. They're data. But traditional goal-setting treats them like either fuel ("stay motivated!") or interference ("overcome your limiting beliefs!"). What about the messy, complex, totally valid emotional reality of being alive?

What actually nourishes you. Not every meaningful goal will feel easy or fun. Some important things are hard and draining. But if everything on your list depletes you? If there's nothing that actually feeds you? That plan is not sustainable, babe.

The inevitability of life happening. Rigidity breaks. The plan you made in January doesn't know that you'll get sick in March, that your parent will need you in May, that you'll get a wild opportunity in July that changes everything.

Threshold spaces. What about when you're between identities? When you're no longer who you were but not yet who you're becoming? When you're in the messy middle and nothing feels clear? Traditional frameworks have no language for that liminality.

It's not about lowering your standards. It's about raising the accuracy of your approach

This is where goal setting alternatives come in—frameworks that complete what traditional approaches miss.

The SENSUAL framework is one of those alternatives.

Not to replace SMART goals. To complete them.

To add back all the pieces that make goal-setting work for actual humans who have bodies and feelings and lives that shift.

And listen—this isn't about lowering your standards or letting yourself off the hook.

It's about raising the accuracy of your approach.

Why You Keep "Returning" to the Same Lessons (And Why That's Not Failure)

Can I tell you something I wish someone had told me years ago?

Growth isn't linear. It's spiral.

You don't move past lessons and leave them in the dust. You return to them—at different altitudes, with different perspectives, carrying different tools.

The same themes show up again and again. Not because you failed to learn them the first time, but because you're ready to understand them more deeply.

I've watched this in my own life, in my business, in my relationships. I'll work through something—really work through it, therapy and journaling and all the things—and think, "Okay, got it, moving on."

And then six months later, there it is again. Same lesson, different costume.

And my first thought used to be: Ugh. I thought I was DONE with this.

But here's the reshift: I'm not regressing. I'm spiraling.

I'm coming back to the same lesson at a new level of depth, with more capacity to integrate it, with lived experience I didn't have before.

This is the geometry of becoming.

Growth isn't linear. It's spiral.

And it matters for goal-setting because the map you're using determines what you think progress looks like.

If you think growth is a straight line from here to there, any deviation feels like failure. Any return to familiar territory feels like going backward.

But if you understand growth as spiral—cyclical, seasonal, deepening—you can plan accordingly.

You can set goals that account for seasons of expansion and seasons of integration. You can build in space for pivots without calling it "giving up." You can honor that your capacity shifts and that doesn't mean you're broken.

You're allowed to pivot.You're allowed to return.You're allowed to adapt.

The question is: does your goal-setting approach allow for that?

Or does it set you up to feel like you're failing when you're actually just being human?

Goal Setting Alternatives: The SENSUAL Framework

So what are the alternatives to traditional goal-setting frameworks?

What does a complete map look like?

The SENSUAL framework brings your whole self back into the process:

🧘‍♀️ Somatic

What does your body say about this goal? Not your brain's logical assessment of whether it's "good" or "should" matter. What happens in your chest, your gut, your shoulders when you imagine pursuing it? Your body knows things your mind is still figuring out. Listen to it.

💓 Emotive

 What feelings does this goal evoke? Before you start, while you're in it, when you imagine having achieved it? And not just "motivation" or "resistance"—the full spectrum. Your emotions are information about alignment, capacity, and what actually matters to you. They're not background noise.

🔋 Nourishing

Does this goal feed you or drain you? Some goals are hard and nourishing. Some are necessary but depleting. The question isn't whether it's easy. It's whether your overall plan has enough nourishment to sustain you through what's hard. You can't run on fumes forever, no matter how disciplined you are.

📖 Smart

Yes, still specific and measurable. Clarity still helps. We're not throwing out structure—we're adding what's missing.

🙋‍♀️ Unique

Is this actually your goal? Or did you borrow it from someone else's highlight reel? High-achievers are especially vulnerable to this. We're so good at figuring out what's valued and delivering it that we forget to ask if we even want it. Your goals need to align with your values, not someone else's definition of success.

🔨 Adaptable

Built-in permission to shift as you learn. Not as an escape hatch, but as a feature. What you discover in pursuit of a goal often changes what the goal needs to be. Adaptability isn't weakness. It's intelligence responding to new information.

🌀 Liminal

Honoring threshold moments. The in-between spaces where you're no longer who you were but not yet who you're becoming. These transitions are real. They affect your capacity, your clarity, what's actually possible right now. A complete map accounts for them instead of pretending you can muscle through.

You're used to overriding signals. The SENSUAL framework brings accurate data back into your decision-making.

Here's why this matters especially if you're a high-achiever:

You're used to overriding signals.

You've been rewarded your whole life for pushing through. For not letting discomfort slow you down. For delivering even when you're running on empty.

The SENSUAL framework isn't about "good vibes only" or pretending everything is easy.

It's about bringing accurate data back into your decision-making.

It's about honoring that you're a whole person, not just a to-do list with legs.

What If You Tried a Different Approach This Year?

So here's my question for you:

What would it look like to plan your year with a complete map?

Not another January where you set ambitious goals and white-knuckle your way until you burn out.Not another cycle of shame when the system fails you.

What if you had a practice—not a rigid plan, but an actual practice—that helped you set intentions honoring your capacity, your seasons, your whole self?

That's what Arc: Your Year-Ahead Practice is.

I built it because I was tired of year-ahead practices that felt like either:

"Meh, f* this, I'm too overwhelmed to even start"

OR

"LFGGGG next year is MY YEAR, let me overcommit to everything"

That pendulum swing is exhausting.

Arc meets you exactly where you are:

• 🌙 Meh Mode — When you're barely hanging on and need something gentle (10 minutes, essentials only)

• ✨ SENSUAL Goals — When you have capacity to go deeper with goal-setting alternatives that honors your body, emotions, and actual life (not just what looks good on paper)

  
  

Inside, you'll work through the SENSUAL framework in practice—not just theory, but actual prompts helping you assess each dimension. You'll reflect on 2025 (the wins, the losses, the meh). You'll set intentions that resonate with who you actually are, not who you think you should be.

The outcome isn't a list of goals you'll abandon by February.

It's a practice that adapts with you. A map that's actually complete.

Download ARC here

Download ARC here and see what shifts when you stop trying to fix yourself and start using better tools.

You're not bad at goals.

You've been navigating with an incomplete map and then blaming yourself when you got lost.

The shift isn't about trying harder. It's not about more discipline or better willpower.

It's about having more accurate tools.

Tools that account for your body's wisdom, your emotional reality, your need for nourishment, your life's inevitable shifts.

You get to plan in a way that honors all of you.

Not just the productive parts.Not just the parts that look good on LinkedIn.

All of you.

Start with ARC.

See what becomes possible when the map is finally complete.